Top 10 Things to Discuss Before Marriage

So, you’re thinking about taking the plunge into married life? Awesome! 

It’s a wild ride of love, laughs, and, let’s face it, a few disagreements here and there. But before you say “I do,” there are some must-have chats you and your partner need to dive into. From money matters to future plans, we’re going to break down the top 10 things to discuss before marriage!

  1. Finances- money conversations may be tough to have if you aren’t sure how to approach the topic, but it is important to be transparent about your individual financial situations including, income, debt, savings, spending habits, and financial goals. Discussing how you’ll handle joint finances, such as budgeting, saving, and managing expenses, will help set your marriage up for success.
  2. Careers and Goals- “Professional growth spans the whole of many people’s careers, requiring time, commitment, and change along the way.”(SYMBIS Assessment) It is important to share your career aspirations, long-term goals, and any potential relocations or job changes. Discuss how each of your careers may impact your relationship and future plans.
  3. Religion and Beliefs- talk about your religious or spiritual beliefs, values, and any expectations regarding religious practices. This especially comes into play when raising children with specific beliefs. By having this conversation prior to marriage, it will ensure that you and your partner have similar expectations for the future.
  4. Roles and Responsibilities- discuss expectations regarding chores, roles within the relationship, and how you’ll share responsibilities such as cooking, cleaning, and managing finances. Maybe one of you enjoys folding laundry, and the other enjoys vacuuming- managing these responsibilities ahead of time makes sure you are less like roommates, and more of a team!
  5. Social Life and Relationships- talk about your relationships with friends and family, as well as your expectations for spending time together and maintaining individual social lives. 
  6. Legal and Practical Matters- talk about legal arrangements such as prenuptial agreements, and wills, as well as practical matters like insurance coverage and beneficiary designations. 
  7. Hobbies and Interests- share your hobbies, interests, and passions, and discuss how you’ll support each other’s pursuits and find shared activities to enjoy together. 
  8. Cultural Differences- talk about your cultural backgrounds, traditions, and how they may influence your relationship and future family life. Discuss how you’ll celebrate holidays and important cultural events. Even better, create new traditions together!
  9. Family and Children- discuss your expectations and plans regarding starting a family, including the number of children you want, parenting styles, and childcare arrangements. Children are one of life’s greatest blessings, and will change your life in many ways, so it is crucial to discuss expectations for your future family with your partner. 
  10. Communication and Conflict Resolution- discuss how you’ll handle disagreements and conflicts in your relationship. Talk about communication styles, how you express your needs and concerns, and how you’ll work through challenges together. 

As you navigate through these crucial conversations, it’s natural to encounter challenges or moments where you could benefit from additional support. In such instances, seeking guidance from a professional source can be immensely beneficial. Married Life Counseling offers both pre-engagement and premarital counseling for couples looking to take that next step. Give us a call or schedule a session today! 

Jamie Dunlap

Jamie Dunlap

Jamie Dunlap joined the Married Life Counseling team as Intake Coordinator. She has a diverse background in marketing, team management, and customer relations. Jamie is a Copley gal, married to her high school sweetheart, Greg, and mom to two spirited children who keep them very busy and sleep-deprived.

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