Our Approach
Our Story
Background
Married Life Counseling exists because of my (Christie’s) deep belief in marriage. My journey to this point has not been easy but has filled me with a passion to guide other couples to walk their path to healing together.
I watched my mom and dad struggle, and my husband, Mike, and I struggled, even though we were both very determined to love each other well and to do our marriage better and differently than our parents. We tried many counselors, invested thousands of dollars (that we didn’t have), read books, and went to intensives, retreats, and workshops with very little change.
During my schooling and training, I learned about Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), and my husband and I garnered up what little energy and hope we had left and attended a weekend EFT retreat, and it stuck. At the same time, Mike yielded to an Adult ADHD diagnosis he’d received about a decade earlier and began treatment. We still have work to do, but as we both remain humble, teachable, and personally responsible, we are finding connection, intimacy, and the friendship we started out with and have always hoped for.
I believe we have a God who modeled for us and designed us for relationships, whether we are married or not. Marriage happens to be one of the most significant relationships that best establishes security, safety, soothing, and significance for adults and children. Studies show that happily married couples actually have healthier, more productive, and longer lives.
Regardless of your faith, the principles our team at Married Life Counseling uses and teaches will help you navigate communication and conflict in a way that will “stick,” provided you’re willing to yield, explore, and engage.
Our Approach
Emotionally Focused Therapy
EFT in counseling typically refers to Emotionally Focused Therapy. It is an evidence-based approach to couples therapy that focuses on improving emotional connections between partners. The goal is to help couples recognize and change negative interaction patterns, develop a more secure bond, and create emotional safety within the relationship. EFT is grounded in attachment theory, which emphasizes the importance of secure emotional bonds in relationships for overall well-being. It’s widely used by therapists to help couples understand their emotions and improve communication and intimacy.
What to Expect
Your Questions Answered
What will the first session be like?
For couples counseling, the initial sessions focus on understanding the dynamics of the relationship. The first session is a general discussion about the issues you’re facing and your goals for counseling. In the 2nd and 3rd sessions, each partner will have an individual session to share their perspective openly, without fear of judgment. These individual sessions allow for a deeper, more candid discussion. The counselor will also do an in-depth assessment of self care. By the fourth session, the couple will meet together with the counselor to dive beneath the surface, slow down the conversation, and begin working toward meaningful change.
For individual counseling, the approach is simpler. In the first session, you will talk about the reasons you’re seeking counseling, do an in-depth assessment of self care, and establish goals for personal growth and results.
How many sessions will I/we need to schedule?
For the best outcomes, we recommend committing to at least 8-10 weekly sessions. This time frame allows individuals or couples to fully explore their challenges, collaborate with the counselor on finding healthy solutions, and work through what is and isn’t effective in creating lasting change. We will always follow your lead to ensure our approach aligns with your needs and budget. As time goes on, couples often transition to bi-weekly or monthly sessions to check in on their progress and maintain consistency. At Married Life, our ultimate goal is to help couples achieve their objectives and eventually ‘graduate’ from counseling.
What tools do you use in counseling?
Genogram:
In every initial session, we create a Genogram, which is a visual representation of a person’s family, their relationships, and medical or mental health histories. This tool helps provide insight into family patterns and influences, giving the counselor a clearer picture of each individual’s background.
Handouts and Worksheets:
Throughout your counseling journey, your counselor may provide handouts and worksheets tailored to your specific situation. These resources will also be accessible through our client portal for continued use between sessions.
Books & Podcasts:
All of our counselors are avid readers and podcasters and will recommend relevant books or podcasts based on your circumstances. Some books are available for purchase in our office, while others can be found on author websites, Amazon, or at your local library.
Ready to get started?
Our Process
We believe marriage counseling is for ALL couples because it’s such a significant relationship. We make it easy and even fun! Counseling isn’t always heavy and hard, you’ll find laughter and humor as we dive into personalities and stories that are unique to you.
1
Schedule Appointment
Sometimes, the hardest part of creating lasting change is taking the first step. We’re here to make that easier by answering your questions and helping you find the right clinician to meet your needs. To schedule your first appointment, all we need are a few details: your name, email address, phone number, and a credit card to secure the booking. If you’re scheduling for both yourself and your partner, please provide a separate email address and phone number for them as well. We’d love to chat and guide you through the process.
2
Complete Paperwork
All intake forms are sent to your email, giving you access to your private, confidential client portal. Allow 30 to 60 minutes to complete all forms. This is an important step because it helps give us an overview of what’s happening and prepare for your first session. The client portal provides you with 24/7 access to all of your paperwork, invoices, scheduling, worksheets, and handouts.
3
Meet with Your Counselor
In the first appointment, we’ll get to know each other, create a genogram, (a quick diagram that illustrates your family members, history, and relationships), and explore what’s happening today. We’ll begin to formulate a plan to move forward and you’ll receive handouts, suggestions, and resources for next steps that apply to your specific situation.
We’d love to hear
from you!
Are you ready to start
a conversation?
Give us a call at
234-303-2325
“The colossal misunderstanding of our time
is the assumption that insight will work with
people who are unmotivated to change.
If you want your child, spouse, client, or boss to shape up,
stay connected while changing yourself
rather than trying to fix them.”
– Dr. Edwin Friedman